My pal Katie at Words for Worms participates in this super fun blog game by The Broke and the Bookish…and when she told me today’s topic, I knew that I had to participate! Of course, first things first…I had to post about my Florida vacation over on my regular blog, Quirky Chrissy.
So, now that we’ve got the mad linkage out of the way…My Top 10 Most Frustrating Characters
10. Arnie Cunningham. Christine. I had to read this book…I mean it was literally a book with my name on it! But Arnie made me so mad. I know that the evil possessed car had a hold on him, but seriously, dude. Stop. Just stop being such an evil douche canoe!
9. Sansa Stark. A Game of Thrones OH MY GOD. Stop being such a little princess, already. I can’t believe that you think you’re in love with such an evil little human. That kid is bad. And he’s the reason your wolf is dead. Not your awesomely bad ass little sister. Maybe you should try to be more like her. Life wouldn’t be easier, but at least it would be more fun!
8. Sookie Stackhouse. Dead Until Dark. Sook, here’s the thing. In the TV show, you’re likable. In the book, you’re annoying as fuck. It’s no wonder you don’t have any friends. You are a strange bird, and it’s like you don’t want any normal friends. Stop worrying about how much money the vampires owe you and start making some real life human friends. Go out for drinks. Get drunk. Make out with a human. I’m just saying…
7. Rosemarie Terenzio. Fairytale Interrupted. I know, she’s a real person. Which makes me all the more annoyed. She’s so self-centered. In writing a book about JFK Jr. and his untimely death, I’d expect to cry. Guess what? I felt nothing, because Rosemarie was too busy telling me about the clothes and shoes she got from Carolyn Bessette.
6. Mr. Collins. Pride and Prejudice. He’s so gross, and yet, so fucking cocky that I want to slap him. When he proposes to Elizabeth, and she says no, he’s shocked…Like she should be so lucky as to marry some nasty old man cousin . Ew. When Charlotte married him, I was surprised and sad for her. When Elizabeth visited him, though…His cockiness held no bounds. It was awful.
5. Bella Fucking Swan. Twilight. Seriously. If it’s possible for a book character to more whiny and annoying, I think I might follow a lemming off a cliff. (Oh. Wait. Someone turned her into a virginal adult who gets involved in BDSM and named her Ana Steele. Someone direct me to a lemming cliff.) So Bella. Silly whiny Bella. I get depression. I do. I’ve been there. I’ve even been there after being dumped. But I never tried to jump off a cliff in order to envision my lost love yelling at me. (OK, I see where I’m going with these lemmings. Strike the whole lemming cliff thing.) Bella, grow up. And find a human. Or just become a vampire. But stop whining about it.
4. Edward Cullen. Twilight. Dude. The girl WANTS to be a vamp. You love her. You want to eat her because she’s not a vamp. Just bite the bitch and get it over with. For real.
3. Amy March. Little Women. My first classic novel. I loved Jo with all of my heart. The day Amy burned her manuscript, I cried. I cried because she was so cruel. A spoiled, rotten little brat, who got everything she wanted, including Laurie. This bothered me so much. Even when Jo didn’t want to marry Laurie.
2. Edmund Pevensie. The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe. Edmund, Edmund, Edmund. You screwed everything up! You were so angry at your brothers and sisters for what? Because you’re a little jerk? Get over yourself and stop being the bad kid. I guess, in the end, it all works out. Sort of.
1. Becky Bloomwood. Confessions of a Shopaholic. I love her. But she makes me SO. FUCKING. ANGRY. The lies. The lies. The spawn of lies, even though she has an amazing best friend, a slightly neurotic but lovable family, and a handsome wealthy husband. Seriously, Becky. STOP LYING. PLEASE. I would love you so much more if you didn’t create all of these crazy schemes to get what you want. It’s already yours! (For the record, this was also the WORST movie portrayal of a book in the history of ever.)
So there you have it, blog friends!